Monday, November 30, 2009

Home Sweet Home !!!

The crowd departed ways, and I managed to push my trolley full of bags a little further, and standing amidst the over bulging group of people were three familiar faces, two of which I have missed a lot the entire year around, and the third face, whom I had been missing for about a month or so. Ah ! What a relief, as I took a deep breath of the not so cold, a little moist, sand smelling air of Ahmedabad, as I embraced upon my dad, mom and Dipali, and felt nostalgic about being back amongst familiar territory, shining in the warmth of my parents and the love of Dipali.

Every year, most of us, including me go through this phase mostly at the end of the year, when we the so-called NRIs (Nachta Rakhadta Indians), pay a visit to our parents, loved ones, family members - back to our home city ! The build up to the trip is always exiciting with loads of shopping, packing, weighing the bags, and most importantly planning out the entire stay with a checklist of fav restaurants, hang out places, things to do etc etc .. Ooff !! A lot of things to cover in a limited stay, and the list just never ends. Above all is the umbrella of the unavoidable social life that we Indians boast all around the world.

Well the only painful event that one experiences in between is the freaking tiresome 22+ hours flight (30-40 hours in some cases with long stop overs), but alas, there is no option to that. But even more cursable thing is when the idiotic, full of attitude airline rep gives you loads of s***, first about the weights of your bags, including the carry on items, and then once you take care of that, he ensures you that your seats are the best in the entire flight.

The moment of surprise grabs you when you actually go and check out your seats in your flight. This current trip of mine had two extremes - First the rate that I got for my return fare the cheapest of my entire stay in the US, and along with that, the seats that the freak rep assigned to me were the worst of all my trips till date.

For a painful 15-17 hours of the first leg of the flight from SF to Singapore, me and my friend, not only got cramped in almost all the joints below the neck, but we also experienced approximately about 20-30 K sounds of the flight's toilet flush. The bloody ass rep somehow assigned us seats just next to the toilet, and not only that, those seats just would not recline as much like the other seats.

Well but as most of us know, the Singapore airport is something that one cannot complain about anything going wrong. Awesome infrastructure, but above all, great munching all around. There is Kaveri the Indian restaurant which is a must for everyone to dine at, but then there was this another one called "Chutney Mary" and if you happen to be there, you are surely not to miss their "Mushroom+Cheese Kathi Rolls". Ohhh Mind Blowing !!!

Apart from all these experiences, it's now just 10 more days to go, before I join the bandwagon of married people. Preparations are in full swing, invitations are out, clothes are being stitched and trials are under way, and a full load of other activities are going on in terms of the preparations.

Hopefully I think I might get some time to post a final blog !
What? Do you think I am going to end blogging? Oh no, that is not what I meant.
Final Blog as a bachelor is something I would like to post maybe a day or two before the marriage if I get that chance. After that who knows, what is gonna change in my life, but I guess whatever happens would be for a whole lot of good reasons :) :) :)

Any warnings from the married people out there ?
Now is the right time to send those out lol !


Friday, November 20, 2009

Troublesome and Torturous Thursdays !!!

Well, what can I say, and what can I expect more that it was a perfectly fine Thursday morning yesterday. Last week, Thursday turned out to be a goof up from my side, with me ending up visiting my friend's place for his birthday celebrations, completely overlooking the exact schedule, and what happened next most of you know from my last post.

Well, come this Thursday, I thought maybe last week was just my own fault, but then what happened yesterday was even more frustrating, agonizing and worth posting here. Now, the background was, that since I am getting married (can't still get out of that weird feeling), my parents sent me a parcel full of invitation cards (kankotris), which were supposed to be distributed to my friends, family members and dad's friends here in the US.

The FedEx website, where I was tracking my package for the past couple of days, finally showed "Delivered" and I was more than happy to breathe in relief that finally it was here. As it happened, I went to check my mail box (on a lovely Thursday evening), only to find no FedEx cards/notices/tags indicating that the package has been delivered. Initially nothing struck me, as I simply walked up to the leasing office, and informed them about this package in my name which could have been delivered to the "Office" as it mentioned on the FedEx website.

As fate would be, it was not found at the leasing office. So I went back to my apartment, opened up the #%*%% FedEx website, only to be struck with horror that somehow, someone named "FriedLand" had signed for that package. I eventually called up the Customer Rep at Fedex, who nicely mentioned that, Dear Sir, I appreciate your #%#%#& business with FedEx, and our records show that the package was delivered to you in M-208 !!!

M-208 ? WTF !!! I live in an entirely different unit you moron ! The FedEx Rep then scheduled for a retrieval of the pacakge, and get it delivered to me. Well as I am writing this blog, that has not yet happened and is still in the #%^&@ FedEx system.

But the more frustrating part is what happened next. I thought let me give it a shot and try going to the M-208 unit and request the tenant to just hand me over the parcel. I take this long walk across the community, walk up to the front door, see a broken Key Hole, peep inside it to see some lights on, and I knock. A couple of knocks later, and a painful wait of 15 minutes, the lights just went off !!! I was like WTF again and #%&*# just stood there cursing everything and everyone that I can think of, in my mind.

Then I thougt of playing the role of a detective as I knocked on the door for the last time, and moved away from the door in a jiffy and laid flat against the wall. After counting 5 mentally, I just popped up outside the door right in front of the keyhole, but just to see no action from the other side of the door. Plan B had failed !!!

Delta Bravo, switch to Plan C !!! Let's go let's go !!! So I knocked on the door twice again, and went off casually, acting as if I am leaving. I parked my car in front of the apartment, and sat inside, for another 15 minutes or so, to expect someone coming out of that damn door, and I would plan to catch him/her by surprise. Nothing happened. Yet another failure.

Now my final Plan D was just to bang on the door until it breaks apart and just barge in the apartment and snatch my parcel. So I climbed the stairs again, with my temper up on the 7th heaven, and my nostrils flaring, I went and was just about to hit the door with my 2.5 Kg Sunny Deol type fist, that I saw someone moving in the apartment from the broken key hole. So I gulped down my anger, and sweetly knocked the door with gentle touches.

Knock ! Knock Knock !! I could see that person moving in the apartment, walking up to the keyhole, as I flashed a sweet smile, and then the person just walked away from the %^&*# hole !!! F***** Weirdo !!! I was like Hello !! The creep just did not open the door. I was standing their, my mouth wide open, my eyes rolling and cursing the damn FedEx guy who screwed up in the first place.

So controlling my anger, I went to the leasing office and told them this entire story (only to find that agent yawning at 9 in the morning in my face), and the answer I got was - "That is a corporate housing apartment, and so they don't expect someone to come and meet them at their front door. As they don't know you, they would definitely not open the door".

Are you F****** kidding me ? Do I look like some one who has come to rob in broad daylight the first thing in the morning ? So as per the leasing agent's suggestion, I went and posted a note on that M-208 f*****d up door, that PLEASE SEND THE PARCEL TO EITHER THE LEASING OFFICE or PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR FOR THE FEDEX GUY WHEN HE COMES IN TO RETRIEVE THE PACKAGE !!!

Oh God Almighty !!! Please don't send these kind of people to Earth, and if you do, please make them understand that no one dressed up in a jacket and jeans, with a nice clean shaved beard, would come up to their front door at 8.30 in the morning on the most happiest day of the week - A Friday, just to bombard them with some kind of C-4 explosives or some kind of Fucked Up promotional material !!!

There you go, I finally posted my first blog post with the first ever curse without any symbols !!! But only I and only I know the frustration that I have gone through for the past 24 hours, all because of a stupid mistake the FedEx person did and all for the most important Kankotris (Wedding Invites) that are inside that package.

Well now that it's a great Friday evening, I eventually tried one more time walking to the M208 door, and found that my note was still stuck there, so I ripped it apart, took a deep breath, and knocked on the door, and mind you the apartment was full of lights. As I saw someone approach the key hole, I gave the best of my smiles, and held up the note that I had with the words FedEx highlighted in RED !!!

I was literally standing there with that note in my hand, smiling to that door, wondering what someone might think of if they see me like that, as if I am some poor chap asking for donations or selling some books. And Click !! I finally heard that sound which I so much wanted hear and the door opened up. Now I had never expected what I saw at the door.

A gorgeous, spotless, speck less, charming, beautiful, adorable cute Russian chick opened the door, and I just stood there staring at her blankly. I had to run for some words, as I finally managed to convince her that she might have one of my packages which is quite important and FINALLY ! With God's blessings I got that package and I just hold on to it for 2 minutes hugging it tightly.

Well painful as it was, the wait was worth it as I now stood holding my own Wedding Invitation card !


Thursday, November 12, 2009

Lost and Absentminded - A Goof Up !!!

This blog post comes as just a 2 minute write up of what happened about an hour ago just now, and how I messed up, completely dumbfounded at my own negligence.

There could have been numerous occasions when one could have found himself/herself having overlooked something, or forgotten a date or an important event, or maybe just simply absentminded about some birthdays and anniversaries.

But what I did, was quite dumb to be honest, but then thinking carefully, it seems I am so much lost and sad in Dipali's absence that I completely overlooked and my mind lost in her thoughts that I goofed up for a friend's birthday today. So the entire blame of this funny episode goes to Dipali, with she not being here and me missing her too much (lol)...

What happened was truly hilarious to an extent that it could have been a big surprise for my friends who were celebrating their 27th birthday seeing me standing at their front door. Ths situation was this - two of my friends have back to back birthdays and co-incidentally they are married to each other (happily and lovingly). Now the male friend of mine sends out an invite with crystal clear words describing where and more importantly "WHEN", the celebration and cake cutting would be.

Now today on a fine Thursday evening, I finished my dinner, watched some sports videos online, and washed my face, combed my hair, sat in the car and drove like 15 miles to his apartment, taking pains of doing the parallel parking (which is quite hard to find outside their apartment), and finally walked up the stairs to see the lights out in their apartment.

Checking twice as to whether or not I was standing at the correct apartment, I banged the door 2-3 times, rang the door bell as if it was a buzzer of some game show, and finally decided to give him a call. As soon as he picked up the phone, I was like, $%^&$ where are you? He is like, Outside ! I am like, #@$@$% you said 9.30, and I am here 9.35 sharp, and you tell me you are outside !!!

What came next, was a very dreadful laughter and I was like what the heck happened ? He is like, Dude, the invitation was for tomorrow, the 13th, Friday and not today !!!!!

Oh Man !!! I was standing there outside his apartment, laughing at my own ass. Well I could just imagine, just in case if they were at home, and found me standing outside at 9.30 today, what would have been his reaction !!

Well funny or not, I found it quite amusing, that Dipali's absence has made my mind go ballistic, being so absentminded and goofing up at the odd hour. I must have surely woken up at the wrong side of the bed today I guess ...

Well having said that, I wish that couple a very happy birthday, and hopefully I get treated to 3-4 pieces of extra cake tomorrow during the "REAL" celebration, for this extra effort that I went through...

(PS: The names have not been revealed for the sake of being anonymous about them)

This I think has been the fastest blog post that I have ever posted lol ... And further, this goof up really speaks for how much I miss either Dipali or some really good liquor to get my mind on track (Belvedere, Long Islands ???) Lol (Wink, I know she never reads my blog)